Review of The Gathering, Parts I, II, and III by M.N. Wiggins

"The Gathering" is a witty golf-themed story by M.N. Wiggins published on Once Upon a Crocodile. It's a serial story about a group of "OAPs" (old-age pensioners) embarking on their yearly sentimental golf outing.

But this year, things are different. One of the OAPs, nicknamed Cookie Jim, has a vendetta against his golfing gang. He wants revenge.

I don't know how many installations of this serial story the e-zine intends to publish. There have been three so far, which means I can't provide a critique of the story's ending yet.

I decided to review the part I've read anyway because M.N. Wiggins' story is funny, suspenseful, and free for you to read.

Length: 20+ minutes

Genre: Humor

General Impressions

Q. How's the hook?

Cookie Jim bakes cookies on the daily, selling them to college kids as they head across campus to their classes. In the story introduction, we see him baking up something scrumptious while chatting at his brown-and-black dachshund in a small apartment.

This first-person story hooks the reader by talking about homemade chocolate chip cookies. If you're hungry or have a sweet tooth, that may be all the incentive you need. But if not, you'll probably be hooked by paragraph 5, when Wiggins reveals the story setting.

The hook establishes some fast facts about the main character, including his occupation and life situation. There may be some symbolism here. Even in his old age, Cookie Jim is a servant to students. He's someone they "use" for a quick high.

We're swept quickly into the meat of the plot, which amps up as Cookie Jim attends the week-long golf gathering with his old school associates. He refers to the group as The Magnificent Seven, or the Seven.

Q. What made me want to keep reading?

Cookie Jim feels no warmth or sentimentality toward his old classmates. On the contrary, he's pissed at them. The plot thickens: What did these old geezers do to make him so mad?

Through colorful flashbacks, the reader gets a front-row seat to a string of Cookie Jim's bad memories involving the guys, who are named Greg, Sonny, Lance, Hal, Billy Jack, Bobby Joe, and Booger.

For example, we see those hoodlums throw a drunken Cookie Jim into a swimming pool with a live crocodile. A struggle for his life ensues. Someone films the struggle for the viewing enjoyment of Jim's fellow teenage classmates.

Through colorful present-tense dialogue, the reader sees that the Seven still verbally abuse Cookie Jim in his old age. Nothing has changed. He's still "serving" as entertainment fodder for the "popular" guys.

What is Cookie Jim's motivation for attending the golf gathering?

That's the question that made me want to keep reading.

Q. What did I think of the plot?

As the plot develops, Jim's motive for attending the golf retreat becomes increasingly clear.

In Part II, the reader gets an inkling.

In Part III, Cookie Jim's endgame is crystal clear.

How many more installations of this serial tale will follow? I'm not sure. I was bummed when i realized there's no Part IV yet, but I'm assuming Once Upon a Crocodile will eventually publish the rest.

Q. Did I enjoy the main character?

Did you watch Jim Carrey's 1996 comedy, The Cable Guy? Did you resonate with Carrey's character ... his hilarity, his patheticness?

If so, this story is for you.

In fact, I'd venture to say that Jim Carrey could play Cookie Jim if this short story were ever turned into a movie. He's in his sixties now, just like Cookie Jim.

If not Jim Carrey, maybe Bill Pullman. He's quite skilled at portraying sad, put-upon main characters.

Q. How was the writing style?

M.N. Wiggins writes realistic, snappy dialogue that simultaneously advances the story and fleshes out the characters.

Most of the paragraphs are short, which readers tend to appreciate. When occasionally a paragraph is a bit longer, it's easy to read because of all the surrounding white space.

Even though I'm not a golf fan or a man in his sixties, I'm pretty excited about this author and this story. I'll be watching Once Upon a Crocodile to see how it ends. Actually, I think I might know how it ends, but I'm excited to find out if I'm right ... and to see how Wiggins ties up each character thread.

Let's talk about "The Gathering" by M.N. Wiggins in Once Upon a Crocodile. Leave your comment below!

Review of Short Story "Ballad of the Haint Hound Killer" by Ryan Michael Hines

I read this short story on Shotgun Honey, a small publishing house that features a selection of free flash fiction stories as well as books for sale.

Shotgun Honey's flash fiction concentrates on the crime, thriller, and mystery genres. Published stories range from 250 to 700 words, according to the submissions page.

If you like thrillers, don't have time to read a novel, or just want a quick literary thrill, Shotgun Honey would be a fun site to bookmark.

I enjoyed reading six of Shotgun Honey's recently published stories before choosing to review "Ballad of the Haint Hound Killer."

Length: 5 to 6 minutes

Genre: Thriller

General Impressions

Q. How's the hook?

The plot is interspersed with verses of a poem or song ... a ballad, if you will. (A ballad, according to the online Cambridge Dictionary, tells a story by way of song or poem.)

The first lines of the story are also the first lines of the ballad. I consider this the hook. And although I'm not a huge poetry fan, I wanted to see if the author handled the ballad/narrative format well.

After all, it can be hard to cram in action and thrills when you're waxing poetic.

But as it turns out, Ryan Michael Hines knows how to weave poetry into a quick action story.

Q. What made me want to keep reading?

After a few lines of poetry, we get down to the meat of the story.

The main character (who I assumed to be male, though it is not specified) is on his way to see his brother, whom he has not seen in years. The brothers "share a sin" of some kind, but the nature of the sin is not immediately specified.

This intrigued me. What shared sin? The suspense that made me want to keep reading.

In sparse detail, the nature of the sin is eventually revealed. Sidenote: If the author were to expand this into a novel, the mystery of the "shared sin" would be an enticing draw!

Q. What did I think of the plot?

With a word count limited to 700 words, a plot can only go so far. But for your buck, Ryan Michael Hines gives a fair helping of bang.

You might say "Ballad of the Haint Hount Killer" is the "end" of a much longer story the writer only hints at. There's a lot of backstory we never learn. If the writer were to expand the story into a longer form, here are three things I'd love to know:

• What is the setting of the story?
• Why was the sin so sinful?
• Who is the Haint Hound killer?

Q. Did I enjoy the characters?

No character in this story is "likable," but all are colorful. The main character is slightly more principled than his brother. He seems like a back-country kinda fellow, and some of his narrative hints that he's either undereducated or steeped in local dialect. ("So I went to see my brother ... the one what lived on the mountain.") That said, he artfully narrates his situation. For example, he says, "The sparrows' flight told me it'd not be long before I was discovered ..."

Q. How was the writing style?

I applaud this writer because I always understood exactly what was happening. Given the amount of action that takes place, and the fact that there are three characters taking up oxygen, that's admirable.

The ballad itself is never overbearing. It's poetic but not uppity or insufferable, as some poems (in my opinion) are.

Q. Is the ending satisfying?

The writer bends logic a bit to deliver an ending that is satisfying yet a little unrealistic. I can't fully explain because I don't want to ruin it for you. Suffice it to say, the main character gives away some information he could never actually know.

That's okay, though. In a delightful way, the entire story beckons the reader to suspend disbelief.

Want to read "Ballad of the Haint Hound Killer" by Ryan Michael Hines? Here is the link!

Review of Short Story "Growing House" by Madison Ellingsworth

I read this story at Flash Fiction Online. 

Length: 2 minutes 

Genre: Flash 

General Impressions 

Growing House is a quirky piece of flash fiction. The ending is predictable, yet the writer depicts it colorfully. Some of the word choices are strange.

Q. How's the hook? 

The one-sentence hook encourages the reader to imagine Mother sitting on a chaise while eating peanuts and giving herself a pedicure.

The logistics of these two actions sparked my curiosity. Exactly how does a person eat with one hand while clipping their toenails (or, in the case of Mother, painting her toenails) with the other? Sounds like a bit of a feat to me.

But I'm interested in feats. What's more, I'm interested in characters who do things I might do. Simultaneously eating and tending to personal hygiene sounds like a familiar, rushed, early-morning activity I've done.

The second sentence is dialogue. Mother speaks bluntly about the physique of her pet frog, Peg-Peg. Dialogue pulls me in pretty quickly. Overall, the hook is good.

Q. What made me want to keep reading? 

A story about a fat frog is always interesting ... at least for a while.

Peg-Peg is referenced as "he" and "him." "Peg" is typically a female name, but whatever.

The writer does a good job describing the frogishness of the frog. He "sags" on the ground. He gazes with "bulbous" eyes at a frog-shaped outdoor fountain.

Frogs are fun. The story is short. I decided to keep reading.

Q. What did I think of the plot? 

Why is Peg-Peg so fat? Why does Peg-Peg keep getting fatter? That's the driving question.

Out of concern for the frog's well-being, Mother makes a vet appointment for Peg-Peg. 

But before she can slide the frog into a Tupperware container poked with holes for the occasion, Mother and the narrator (presumably her daughter or son) notice that Peg-Peg is no longer fat. They quickly realize why Peg-Peg was so big in the first place.

I won't put a spoiler here, but you can probably guess. Hint: It has something to do with tadpoles.

Q. Did I enjoy the main character? 

I pictured the narrating character as Mother's adult daughter. You might picture them as Mother's son. No gender is actually provided. 

Adult Daughter/Son wields a daquiri for most of the story. They're relaxing in the sun.

Here's a sentence about Adult Daughter/Son that had me puzzling: "Olive oil was sizzling on my chest, and the air smelled of barbecue."

It made me wonder if Adult Daughter/Son was actually a slab of meat on the grill.

I mean, why? Why does Adult Daughter/Son have sizzling olive oil on their chest? This is never fully explained. I supposed some people might use olive oil as tanning oil. But why would they allow the oil to sizzle? Ouch.

Q. How was the writing style? 

The writing style is simple and straightforward. It's not hard to read. You could read this short story after a long day of work or even during a bathroom break in the middle of the night, and it would (mostly) make sense.

Q. Is the ending satisfying? 

I give a hearty, resounding "yes" to this question. 

Adult Daughter/Son and Mother end up in a bizarre predicament as a result of Peg-Peg.

The last image created an unusual tableau in my mind's eye ... one I think most lovers of flash fiction would appreciate.

Want to read "Growing House" by Madison Ellingsworth in Flash Fiction Online? Here is the link to the short story one more time!

Review of Short Story "The Forest Through the Teas" by Wendy Nikel

I read this story at Flash Fiction Online, a favorite site dedicated to "bold" and "brief" fiction. Flash fiction, if you will.

Length: 4 minutes

Genre: Humor

General Impressions

Q. How's the hook?

The author sets the scene immediately, informing the reader that the event takes place at a tea party attended by a grandmother-granddaughter duo.

The author also sets the mood immediately, stating that the grandmother has never felt prouder, whereas the granddaughter has never looked more miserable.

“Lavatera” by Provincial Archives of Alberta, No known copyright restrictions

Q. What made me want to keep reading?

I wanted to know why the granddaughter was miserable. When the author reveals that the granddaughter is 13 years old, that partially explains it. Thirteen-year-olds aren't typically thrilled with their elders.

But spending time with a grandparent can be a beautiful thing, and I wanted to know the situation.

Here's another reason I wanted to keep reading: The writer begins this satirical piece with plenty of plant-themed puns. I wanted to see if she would continue to keep up her punny pace.

Q. What did I think of the plot?

The plot is secondary to the punny writing style, in my opinion.

In fact, I wondered if the writer's primary goal was to cram as many plant puns as possible into one short fiction piece. I wondered if this was an assignment for a writing class. "Write a short story with as many puns as possible."

That's not a criticism. Given the ending, the plot was surprisingly deep when you consider how short and punny the story is.

Q. Did I enjoy the main character?

Grandmother Hyacinth and granddaughter Callie (Calanthe) are dynamic characters, and both do a bit of growing and changing over the course of the story. I'd say Hyacinthe grows and "improves" her character more than her granddaughter, but they both become better people in the end.

Q. How was the writing style?

I enjoyed the punny style of this story, which is written in the third person and favors the point of view of Grandmother Hyacinthe. But the puns may have been a bit distracting. I had to read the story twice to absorb its full chain of events and their meaning.

Q. Is the ending satisfying?

While the ending is satisfying, like I said, I had to read the story twice to digest its full meaning. That's probably because I was distracted by the puns.

A more astute reader might not have had to read it twice. Still, I was glad I gave it a second read so I could fully appreciate the character development.

Want to read "The Forest Through the Trees" by Wendy Nikel in Flash Fiction Magazine? Here is the link!

3 Places to Submit Your Flash Fiction Online

Are you a flash fiction writer looking to get your work published?

At Online Fiction Review, we adore flash fiction. You can read it while sitting in a parking lot or standing in line. You can read it while on hold with the bank or your credit card company. 

“Hopper, Reading” by Gary Todd, Public Domain Dedication (CC0)

If you're going to be staring at your phone anyway, it's good to engage your brain creatively rather than depressing yourself with social media or the news.

Here are three online publications we like that accept flash fiction submissions.

1. Every Day Fiction

Every Day Fiction accepts multiple genres of flash fiction, and according to their submission guidelines, there is "no such thing as too short." They pay 3 Canadian dollars per accepted story. Check out their submission guidelines here.

Every Day Fiction offers a unique star rating system. Each story published is rated by readers with a maximum of five stars. This allows magazine staff and published authors to see what the public thinks of their work. Yeah, as a writer, that can be a little daunting. But if your story is good enough to be accepted by Every Day Fiction, it's safe to say that some important people have already given it their seal of approval.

We enjoyed "Grey Power," the Every Day Fiction story by Anne Wilkins that we reviewed this summer. At the time of this writing, Every Day Fiction readers had awarded it 4.4 stars.

2. Flash Fiction Magazine

Flash Fiction Magazine publishes one story per day, every day of the year. They accept stories between 300 and 1,000 words. You can read their submission guidelines here.

One of the coolest things about Flash Fiction Magazine is that they're upfront about their selection process. Your story gets read by three editors. If it gets at least one yes, the whole team reviews it. Later, when you receive your acceptance or rejection, they tell you how many votes you got. Sometimes, they include feedback on your story as well.

A while back, Online Fiction Review covered a story from this Flash Fiction Mazatine called "Wife's New Slow Cooker," by author Christian Weir. It's a funny little domestic tale that you can read about on this page.

3. SmokeLong Quarterly

SmokeLong Quarterly publishes short stories of 1,000 words and under. Publication months are March, June, September, and December. The idea is that each story takes about as long to read as you need to smoke a cigarette. Not that you should do that.

If you're a writer who appreciates getting feedback, you can get it from this publisher, which is awesome. But it's not free; you may spend $30 to get feedback statements from three editors. However, if you're looking to improve your writing and don't mind contributing to a good cause, it's a win-win. Read about the various methods of submission to SmokeLong Quarterly here.

Online Fiction Review provided a review of a SmokeLong Quarterly story called Ms. Pac-Man in the Maze in this post. Check it out to see if you agree with our assessment!

Review of Short Story "Ballpark Estimate" by Peter Wallace

I found this short story in Lit eZine, an online magazine posted at the website of writer Mona Soorma.

The story, Ballpark Estimate, intrigued me with its simplicity and relatability.

Length: 5 minutes

Genre: General

"The Last Baseball Game at RFK" (pingnews)”
by pingnews.com, CC BY-SA 2.0

=General Impressions

Q. How's the hook?

A couple is on a date at a baseball game. The woman, Ellen, is clearly not a fan of baseball. The man, Bill, is a baseball fanatic.

This creates conflict right away -- one that I could personally relate to, as I have found myself struggling to find common ground with sports fans.

Q. What made me want to keep reading this short story?

I wanted to see whether Ellen and Bill would make it through their date in one piece.

How would they handle the disparity in their levels of interest in baseball? Would Ellen's disinterest be a deal-breaker for Bill? Would Bill's passion for the game turn Ellen off?

The off-beat dialogue intrigued me as well. Ellen and Bill spoke to each other as if reading from a script. This gave the entire story a quirky air.

Q. What did I think of the plot?

Carried primarily by dialogue, it's not an action-packed plot by any means. Rather, it's an episode in a couple's relationship, a glimpse at a potentially awkward situation and how they handle it.

The primary action occurs when Ellen randomly catches a fly ball. It's a bit fantastical, but it's fun to wonder what's going to happen after Ellen, the baseball noob, performs this feat.

“Baseball Texture” by Filter Forge, CC BY 2.0

Q. How was the writing style?

The style feels like it's from the late 1950s or early 1960s. In fact, I could see this story playing out as a plot in an episode of Leave it to Beaver or The Andy Griffith Show. Even the ending, though slightly risque, would be rated PG at most in a movie theater.

Q. Is the ending satisfying?

The ending satisfies in a quiet way. It's a happy ending to a story with very little conflict. Still, it's fun to see how the author decided to wrap up this cute little conversation.

Want to read "Ballpark Estimate" by Peter Wallace in Lit eZine? Here is the link one more time!

Review of Short Story "Middle Kids" by Temim Fruchter

I found this short story on Midnight Breakfast, an online literary magazine.

Length: About 25 minutes

Genre: Coming of Age

“Empty Theater” by Andrew Jackson, CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

General Impressions

Q. How's the hook?

The main character, Daniela, just moved to a new school and auditioned for the Purim play.

She is emboldened by her new-kid status to try out for the lead, and she nabs it.

As a kid, I devoured Judy Blume's coming-of-age stories about school kids written in her frank, matter-of-fact voice.

This story gives Judy Blume vibes.

Q. What made me want to keep reading this short story?

The author, Temim Fruchter, expertly builds suspense by creating must-answer questions in the reader's mind.

Daniela was expelled from her previous school. Why?

The Purim play will be performed in a monster theme. Why?

Daniela is oddly fascinated by Mrs. Lubin, a dowdy English teacher and the faculty advisor for the Purim play. Why? (Perhaps it's because Mrs. Lubin has a strange physical quirk that students only speak of in hushed tones.)

Q. What did I think of the plot?

The plot follows a relatable timeline of play rehearsals and performance.

Along the way, Daniela deals with the natural obstacles faced by a kid who has changed schools as well as her own unique obstacles, such as life with her parents in the aftermath of an expulsion and the journey of preparing for the role of headstrong Vashti.

It's fun to watch Daniela grapple with these obstacles while also learning about Vashti and the Purim story.

It's also fun to speculate about the symbolism the author has chosen: A struggling female lead plays the part of Vashti. She is misunderstood by many but ultimately realizes what she must do to be fulfilled.

Q. Did I enjoy the main character?

Daniela is an absolute delight.

Like a Judy Blume character, her narrative is honest and witty. You find yourself rooting for her to succeed even though she's not perfect ... in fact, her imperfections are precisely why you care.

Q. How was the writing style?

At nearly 8,000 words, this story is too short to have chapters, but it's long enough to have demarcated scenes separated by hash marks. The scenes move quickly, advancing the plot at a pleasing pace.

“Queen Vashti: Quarrelsome and Quirky.”
by Wes Dickinson, CC BY-NC 2.0

It's admittedly longer than, say, a flash fiction piece. But the pacing is excellent, and it leads to a satisfying conclusion.

Q. Is the ending satisfying?

It's still technically a short story, but the higher word count translates to greater character development and a more suspenseful plot.

This story is worth the extra few minutes it takes to read.

Want to read "Middle Kids" by Temim Fruchter in Midnight Breakfast? Here is the link one more time!

Review of Short Story "I Would Like a Moustache" by Niall Kaye

I read this short story on 3:AM Magazine, an extremely entertaining e-zine I recently discovered and am excited to share. It's a hilarious story by Niall Kaye that I think you'll love. 

I'm looking forward to reading more of Kaye's work -- and more stories at 3:AM Magazine.

Length: 10 to 12 minutes

Genre: Humor

Stick around to read my review of "I Would Like a Moustache" by Niall Kaye. Or, go here to read the story at 3:AM Magazine, and then come back to see if we agree!

General Impressions

Q. How's the hook?

The hook is simply, "I would like a moustache..." The main character goes on to describe the absurd actions he took to gain said moustache. I adore this type of eccentric simplicity, and the question of whether he gets a moustache kept me reading until the end.

       “Mustache Envy” by 

     Hey Paul Studios, CC BY 2.0

Q. What made me want to keep reading this short story? 

It's the voice for me.

You might find yourself reading this story in a deadpan inner voice -- perhaps something like comedian Steven Wright. You might hear a jocular Rodney Dangerfield in your mind's ear. However your brain manufactures this story's voice, it's definitely catchy.

That's what kept me reading: The unique and hilarious voice (including the word choices) of the main character.

For one thing, he refers repeatedly to the other main character (whom you might consider the "antagonist") as the "newly-appointed Secretary of State for Business and Trade." 

Every. Single. Time.

"Newly-appointed Secretary of State for Business and Trade" is a mouthful, but Niall Kaye inserts the phrase 20 times, and it gets funnier each time.

Other quirky wordings abound. For example, Kaye refers to the "Global Network of Computers, Servers, and Smart Appliances" in an everyday tone -- as if anyone calls the internet that. 

"Krav Maga." 

“rowntree's randoms sweets”
by Clyde Darra, CC BY-SA 2.0

"Rowntrees Randoms." 

"Defenestration." 

If you love words, unusual ones, I think you'll love this story.

Q. What did I think of the plot?

In a story like this, plot is secondary to style. (Some say the same of Wes Anderson movies.) 

I think that's okay.

I read this story when I was feeling kinda down. I needed a pick-up, and "I Would Like a Moustache" did the job. For a blissful 10 to 12 minutes, I stopped thinking about my problems.

The plot itself is silly, but then, so is the entire story. And yet, it's magic in approximately 1,500 words. 

Q. Did I enjoy the main character?

The (nameless) main character is a caricature driven only by one desire: to get a moustache.

He might not hold my interest through an entire novel. But he'd probably hold my attention as a character on a sitcom from week to week. Rerun of Monk, anyone?

Q. How was the writing style?

The writing is smart, sometimes wordy, and always funny. 

If you're a writer who reads about writing, you will find sources on the internet that encourage you to write concisely and discourage wordiness. Generally, I agree with that. 

But in this case, wordiness builds character and comedy.

Q. Is the ending satisfying?

The ending is satisfying mostly because the writer manages to wedge in the word "defenestration." 

It's actually just one of many ways Kaye could have chosen to end the story. It's a bit more violent than I would have expected from such a dweeby character, but I'm not complaining.

Want to read "I Would Like a Moustache" by Niall Kaye in 3:AM Magazine? Here is the link one more time!

Review of Short Story "Smile for the Camera" by Andrew Mondry

I found this short story at Weird Lit Magazine. It's a futuristic (maybe near-futuristic!) tale by Andrew Mondry about a father who seeks a little peace.

You'll likely understand the father's struggle for "me-time" whether you have a kid or not. 

Length: 5 to 10 minutes

Genre: Speculative humor

Stick around to read my review of "Smile for the Camera" by Andrew Mondry. Or, go here to read the story at Weird Lit Mag, and then come back to see if we agree!

General Impressions

Q. How's the hook?

The first two sentences appealed to me because the main character, Toby, is struggling to get a little privacy. A little me-time. 

Toby is the father of a baby. Anyone who has cared for a baby knows how hard it can be to feel, well, human ... at least until the child sleeps through the night. 

We see Toby attempting to escape to the bathroom after tending to his infant daughter. He just wants a few moments of peace.

While Toby sits on the throne, the reader learns that "SkyCall" has been activated in the bathroom. 

The nature of SkyCall is not immediately explained, but it soon becomes clear.

Q. What made me want to keep reading this short story?

So, what is SkyCall? Curious minds want to know. 

You might say SkyCall is Andrew Mondry's vision of a futuristic Alexa or Siri. It's a constant digital entity, a presence that chats at Toby any time of day it wants, even in his most private moments.

I knew I liked this story when SkyCall began advising Toby to consider a stool softener as he sat on the toilet.  Yeah, this story incorporates a healthy dose of wit in its cynical futuristic narrative.

When Toby's wife suggests he step out for a breather after dinner, and SkyCall follows him. The reader enjoys more glimpses of how annoying and inconvenient SkyCall is. It's interesting to read because an ever-present AI entity like SkyCall is a real possibility for the reader's future.

Q. What did I think of the plot?

Unlike some short fiction found online, this story has a definite plot.

There is an introduction. A rise in tension. A climax. A resolution at the end that leaves the reader pondering the story's message.

Q. Did I enjoy the main character?

Tony's character is a relatable everyman. He's a family guy and a decent human. He wants what we all want: peace and quiet. "Me time." As the kids would say, "That's so real."

You don't have to be a dad, or even a dude, to relate to Toby and the struggles he faces in this short story. He can't get away from his AI companion, and the AI in his world seemingly affects everything, from the price of his groceries to his safety as he leaves the grocery store.

I enjoyed the main character. He is not an extraordinary person, but he's in extraordinary circumstances, and it's fun and meaningful to see how he deals with it.

Q. How was the writing style?

Writer Andrew Mondry strikes a clever balance between action, description, inner thoughts, and dialogue.

The story moves quickly through Toby's "day in the life" AI adventure. The reader gets a rich picture of the world the author has created -- a digital and oppressive world. 

I found myself admiring some of Mondry's poetic descriptions. For example, when Toby goes out for a walk, he sees the October sun "struggling against the horizon, its warmth losing to winter's dark appetite." 

That's a beautifully written sentence that provides a bit of symbolism. It's a visual representation of the societal "decay" in Toby's world.

Q. Is the ending satisfying?

The ending takes a peculiar and unexpected turn. It's a turn toward semi-violence, but it's not bloodcurdling violence: you could give this story to a tween or teen without feeling guilty.

The ending satisfies. As you read it, you may catch yourself murmuring, "Wow ... well ... that makes total sense!"

Want to read "Smile for the Camera" by Andrew Mondry in Weird Lit Magazine? Here is the link one more time!

Review of Short Story "Big Girls Don't Cry * Fergie" by Adam Shaw

I found this short story on a delightful online fiction website I'd never heard of before called Major 7th Magazine. For lovers of music and online fiction, it's a fun little adventure.

This story is by Adam Shaw. Like most stories in Major 7th Magazine, Shaw's story is based on a song of the writer's choosing. In this case, the writer chose "Big Girls Don't Cry" by Fergie.

Length: Short (3 minutes or less)

Genre: Somewhere between flash fiction and memoir, in my opinion

Stick around to read my review of "Big Girls Don't Cry * Fergie". Or, go here to read the story, and then come back to see if we agree!

General Impressions

Q. How's the hook?

Anyone who's ever been young and in love will appreciate the first sentence of this story, which basically asserts that the main character's college girlfriend broke up with him using a recording of the song "Big Girls Don't Cry" by Fergie.

I was immediately intrigued by the promise of the backstory leading to this juvenile behavior. 

Plus, the story teleported me back to a time when I, too, gleaned extreme personal meaning from pop music. Many of us had a phase in which we framed our life experiences with music, equating various popular songs with significant social and emotional life events.

Q. What made me want to keep reading this short story?

I wanted to know why the main character's girlfriend felt the need to play this song as a backdrop for the breakup. Call me nosy, but I really wanted to know. 

I was also curious to see how the writer would incorporate the lyrics from "Big Girls Don't Cry" into the story. He did a great job of it.

And that's the beauty of Major 7th Magazine. Writers select a song on which to base their short story. Readers choose which stories to read based on the curated "song" (story) list.

Q. Did I enjoy the characters?

I enjoyed the main character who got dumped, the ex-girlfriend who orchestrated the dumping, and the wife who, for years to come, chided him whenever Fergie's song popped up. 

Of those three, I loved the wife the most, probably because of the "full-bellied" laugh she issued when she first learned about the Fergie break-up incident. It depicted her confidence in herself and her relationship as well as her playful relationship with her husband.

Q. Did I like the writing style?

The matter-of-fact college recollections are refreshing. The main character reveals what his college love relationship really was to him: a "tangle of limbs," "cheap booze," and "shitty movies." 

In one paragraph, he's crying over the end of the relationship. In the next paragraph, he and his wife (especially his wife) are highly entertained by it.

In short, I love the light sentimentality and the big humor this story delivers in four short paragraphs.

Q. Was the ending satisfying?

Toward the end of the story, the main character alludes to his wife having an oncology appointment. No further details are supplied. But the implication that the wife has (or had) cancer draws a stark contrast between the nature of his relationships before and after college.

Some readers may be disappointed that the main character does not share more information about his wife's condition. But I think there's simplicity and beauty in keeping that part a mystery.

The story ends with the main character's daughter calling him "silly" for getting lost in an old memory. 

It's not dramatic, but it's a neat way to tie things up. 

Want to read "Big Girls Don't Cry * Fergie" by Adam Shaw in Major 7th Magazine? Here is the link one more time!